Nothing beats the feeling of seeing that big, brown UPS truck roll up in front of my house. The UPS guy brings me great things. He used to bring me chrome when I first got my bike. Then he brought equipment to trick out my bows.
Now, the UPS god blesses me with gifts for my latest obsession: Iaido.
The package he delivered didn’t contain anything fancy, just a wooden practice sword that was shorter than my real blade so as not to poke holes in the ceiling and a pair of kneepads. The kneepads were quality ones with a nice slim profile and a better fit than what I’d found in the local sporting goods stores.
I brought my package of treasures to the office, followed by two cats who believe I order items just so they can have new boxes to sleep in. I sliced open the padded envelope that contained the kneepads… and did a double take.
My buddy Charlie was online at the time and he ended up sharing some of my surprise.
” WTF?” I asked him, stunned. “They don’t sell kneepads in PAIRS??” I couldn’t believe it. I shook the envelope in case I’d missed it and something fell out.
“What? Wait – You got ONE knee pad?”
“Yeah. One knee pad. I mean, damn, it’s a NICE kneepad… But don’t most people have TWO knees?”
“Were you shopping on MartialArtSuppliesForAmputees.com?”
I couldn’t help but laugh despite the fact that I had paid a pretty penny for these (this) snazzy pads (pad) and felt a little cheated.
I sent Charlie the link and told him to have a read. Maybe I had missed something in fine print or the company had made a mistake.
Searching for Clues
When writing your site content, say what you mean and mean what you say. Don’t try to be clever; be clear. Don’t make clients read between the lines.
“Well, the lady in the picture is only wearing one kneepad.” Charlie pointed out. “I think that’s how they get you.” The more we looked at the content on the website, the more we saw all the hidden indicators.
I read the copy again. Not once did it mention pairs or pads. Now I had to buy the other pad and wait some more until delivery arrived. What good was just one kneepad?
“Wait,” Charlie sounded confused. “Are they seriously NOT sold in pairs? I can’t tell from the site either way.”
He thought I was joking. “Dude. They’re seriously not sold in pairs. Who just uses one?”
“Jeez. They obviously employ geniuses in their marketing department.”
For the price I paid, you’d think I would’ve gotten a pair. I didn’t even want to add up how much the two pads cost together; that was just depressing. For that price, the kneepads should be lined in sable.
Speak Up or Hold Your Peace
“I’m going to tell them to change the content to read “Not Sold in Pairs”, I told Charlie. Nobody was going to get one over on Harry McLeod, and I rattled off an email to the company. It’s the least I could do. Some other poor sucker may go padless on one leg because of the same lack of clarity.
I’d like to give the company the benefit of the doubt. Maybe that little note was just an oversight.
The situation did make me wonder how many other people placed orders on websites thinking they were going to receive something and ended up disappointed because they received half or even something completely different.
The issue doesn’t bode well for a happy ending in my book. It’s sloppiness and not well thought out. Because of a simple lack of clarity, I most likely won’t order from that store again.
That is, after I receive my other pad.