She said, “People are inherently lazy and they don’t want to do their own research.”

This made me wonder; is the seventh deadly fear of writing a legitimate fear, or is it simply another excuse of laziness?

I’ve never viewed research as work. To me, research is a chance to broaden my knowledge. Some topics are harder than others, like writing about financial affairs, but I always end up learning something new. Sometimes I research topics I’m already familiar with to make sure my information is still up to date.

No matter what you are writing – a short story, a novel, or a web content article – research is important. Don’t fake knowledge you don’t have. Pulling a bunch of information out of thin air only makes you look bad. If you don’t know what you’re writing about, research the subject or admit to your audience that you lack knowledge.

A large part of writing involves building credibility. All too often, readers believe the written word without thinking critically on whether the information is true or valid.

You, as a writer, have a responsibility to put forth accurate information. Words are very powerful. What you say, no matter how insignificant it might seem to you, could have a huge impact on the reader. This is the reason authors write disclaimers for their novels.

If you’re writing about losing weight, exercising, or legal affairs, you don’t want to be held responsible for a reader misinterpreting your words – and possibly doing something very foolish based on what you wrote.

There are other reasons to research, especially when writing a novel or short story. Your facts regarding the time period, the location, and various other aspects of your characters’ lives should be accurate. A glaring mistake about culture or the description of a neighborhood ruins the story for readers. Worse, it can harm the suspension of belief so vital to a good novel.

For example, my roommate is an avid gun collector. Watching Saving Private Ryan with him involves his running commentary on how the M1 Garands don’t sound authentic. I have to agree. I’ve shot his M1, and it’s loud and intimidating. The sound reverberates off the desert mountains like thunder.

But when the M1s fire in the movie, they sound like little toy guns.

Jurgen Wolff, in Your Writing Coach, talks about research as being overwhelming. It’s easy to see how the situation could evolve into a fear. People often stop working on a project (or don’t even bother to start) because they feel overwhelmed with everything that has to be done.

Outsmart yourself. Break the project down into manageable chunks. Make a list of what needs doing, and then figure out a plan of attack that proceeds in steps – one after the other.

Start with the biggest aspect of the project that you can determine. Pick that apart and keep breaking it down until you feel comfortable with each step or chunk that you have to work on. Set up a time table for each goal – and stick to your schedule.

Your project flows smoothly towards full completion, and you gain a greater sense of accomplishment with each step completed.

I hope this series on the 7 Deadly Fears of Writing has helped. My own explorations while writing these posts revealed much to me about my own writing and work habits. Taking a look at each fear and thinking them over made me wonder why I had those fears in the first place.

In case you missed any of the posts in the series, here they are again:

• Rejection
• Inadequacy
• Success
• Exposing Yourself
• Only One Book
• Too Old to Write

..and of course, today’s post on Research.

The greatest fear is the fear of the unknown. Once you understand why you fear the way you do, you take the first steps towards understanding yourself to make changes for the better.

Happy writing!

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7 Deadly Fears Explored: Fear of Research first appeared on Men with Pens
Copyright 2006 - 2011, All Rights Reserved.

Now, some might think the night would have been a boring experience. Let me tell you, today’s seniors are some of the most active and interesting people I know. Conversations revolved around physical activities – tennis, golf, dancing – and personal projects as well as home businesses and world travel. I hope that I’ll be as active as my parents and their friends in another 20 years.

I’m a literal jack of all trades. My friends often ask, “Is there anything you haven’t done?” I have a list of things I’d like to do before I kick the bucket. There aren’t many things left on there, but there are still a few and I’ll get around to them. I’m not really an expert at anything except for writing or graphics, but I’m content knowing that I can relate to almost any situation.

I believe that the longer you live, the more experience you have under your belt. I think my own life has lent itself well to a writing career. Writing, like wine, gets better with age.
It’s nice to have a specialty, but the more you diversify, the better you’ll write. As you age, you’ll have more material and wisdom to tap into that will put the younger writers to shame.

Take Sharon Cruse as an example. I had the pleasure of speaking with her at the party that night, and I was amazed at her vitality. Sharon has a rich past, is now retired and yet she’s still going strong. She’s print published several self-help bestsellers in several different languages, she has appeared on the Oprah and Phil Donahue shows, and she speaks at conferences and conventions worldwide. And like I said, she considers herself retired.

Man, if that’s retirement, bring it on!

What age and the fear of aging all come down to is a state of mind. You’re never too old to write and you’re always young enough to live. In today’s world, there’s no reason to spend your golden years in a rocker on the front porch.

Unless, of course, that’s exactly where you want to be.

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7 Deadly Fears Explored: Too Old To Write first appeared on Men with Pens
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Jurgen Wolff, author of Your Writing Coach, mentions The 7 Deadly Fears Of Writing. One of those fears belongs to writers who are afraid their first book will be their only work of genius. Many writers pull themselves up short with the question, “What if that’s all I have in me?”.

Many of us have noticed what happens with sequels of novels. All too often, the second or third installment in a series pales in comparison to the brilliance of the first.

Do you know what? It doesn’t matter. If your first book was great, people will buy your second book regardless of what the critics say. They might say it’s a bust after they read, but who cares? They’ve already bought the book. They’ll probably buy the next in the series, too.

My point is that you shouldn’t avoid putting as much effort into your sequels as you did the original. Knock yourself out. If you’ve created something worth reading the first time, people want more – so give it to them. Just don’t give up before you get started.

If you blog, read your posts. How many of them were hits? I bet you only have a few you consider noteworthy. Did you stop blogging after publishing a post that wasn’t so great? No. Did you stop after a post failed to attract a single comment? No. Did you call it quits the first time you had to write a guest post for someone else?

It’s true that some authors were one-hit wonders. Their books hit a social or political nerve at the right time in the right place. Their follow-up novels may not have been as successful. For example, Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell was a huge success. She poured her heart and soul in to this sweeping epic of the old South.

When she tried to create a sequel, Margaret’s efforts didn’t work out at all. Harper Lee, author of To Kill a Mockingbird, is another example of a writer whose sequel flopped.

Both these classic novels came along at a time when their messages were pertinent to much of the social upheaval going on in the world. Sales skyrocketed. Could you imagine if these authors both became fearful of only having one great book in them and never finished their novels?

For those saying, “Harry, I really don’t have more than one book in me! I can’t think of any other stories!” To that, I say bull. You have plenty of stories in you.

Alright, even if you don’t, even if you only have one story in your head right now, isn’t it better to have sold just one book and staked your claim to fame than never to have been published at all?

Jurgen Wolff suggests keeping a notebook of ideas. I have more lists of ideas, plots, and characters than I know what to do with. I may not ever use all of them, but they’re there, stockpiled and ready to go when and if I decide to use them.

Try it yourself. Sooner or later, something clicks. Before you know it, you’ve not only gotten halfway through your first novel, you’ve begun writing ideas down for your second.

Trust me, people; the fear of having only one good book in you is an illusion. It’s just another mind trick we play on ourselves. You have plenty of books and stories inside of your mind – you just don’t know it yet.

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Revealing yourself might also work against you, though, particularly if you write an exposé that pisses off friends and family because you reveal too much. Always remember that while your life experience is your own, your history involves other people’s lives as well. Take their feelings into consideration.

I digress. Unless you’re writing a biography about yourself, I wouldn’t worry about the fear of revealing too much. People see what they want, and many times, what they take from your work is often unrelated to them.

It’s like a daily horoscope that deals in generalities. I used to be a professional tarot reader years ago. I heard other readers spew out mystical questions like, “I see a J in your future… Do you know someone whose name begins with J?”

If you think hard enough, I’m sure you know – maybe even just vaguely – at least one person with a name that starts with J. The good readers, the ones who truly have a gift, pinpoint specifics.

Jurgen Wolff says that people know themselves very little. He believes that the people who read your work of characters or events will always see themselves in what was written – even if the character or event is not based on them.

Why do you think movies have disclaimers that read, “Any characters portrayed in this film bearing a resemblance to individuals living or dead is purely coincidental”?

…Because someone, somewhere, is going to say, “Hey! That guy is just like me! HEY! Maybe it IS me!”

Nothing is different in blogs – and yet everything is different. There is no buffer between you and your audience. There is no one to say, “This isn’t about you. This is about me.” You have to keep in mind that your mother or your boss or your lover may stumble on your blog and read what you wrote.

The amount of information you reveal is totally up to your own personal comfort level. Only you can decide what you want to give to the world and what you want to keep to yourself.

My advice? Don’t be afraid of revealing too much; just reveal information sparingly and with care.

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7 Deadly Fears Explored: Exposing Yourself first appeared on Men with Pens
Copyright 2006 - 2011, All Rights Reserved.

I understood the first two fears of writing that I explored, rejection and inadequacy – but fear of success? This one was going to be interesting. From what I’ve read and researched so far, fear of failure is often fear of success in disguise.

Tell me if this sounds like you: You start a long-term project, and you’re all fired up about it. You make some good progress. Then you have a few starts and stops, and suddenly you lose your momentum, coming to a grinding halt. It feels like someone threw earth on your fire. No matter how hard you try, you just can’t get that initial spark back.

What got in the way? Was happened? Was it something you did or didn’t do? You can’t put your finger on what went wrong at all.

If this fire and earth is a feeling you experience repeatedly, you, my friend, may very well be afraid of success.

Take a step back and ask yourself what scares you so much about succeeding. Are you afraid to lose friends and family? Are you afraid of the attention you’ll receive? Maybe you’re afraid that you won’t be able to maintain a standard of perfection each time you work on a project.

The fear of success is similar to the fear of death. When people think of dying, many think of the pain that might be involved. They’re not afraid of death itself; they’re afraid of what they might feel.

With success, we’re afraid of the side effects surrounding success, all the “what if’s” our over-active imagination conjures for us. To avoid success, we might sabotage ourselves with procrastination or drag our feet on the project – maybe it’ll go away.<

In Diana Pemberton-Sike’s blog The Sideroad, she suggests reviewing our behavioral patterns. Diana claims author Florence Littaur of “Personality Plus” lists four major personality types and how each type deals with success:

• The Choleric knows it all.“There are two ways to do anything; my way, and the wrong way.” The Choleric is quick to act and judge but slow to accept blame for bad decisions. (On your mark, Go!)
• The Sanguine looks for the fun.“Is it boring here, or does anyone else want to PARTY?!” Because of her infectious enthusiasm, the Sanguine can rally support for any cause. If things get dull, it’s “sayonara” Sanguine. (Get Set, Go!)
• The Melancholy is a perfectionist.“Now let’s not rush to any conclusions until we have all the details.” If you need a clever, detailed strategy, ask a Melancholy. Just don’t expect him to act on anything until he has all the facts. (On Your Mark, Get Set, Get Set, Get Set…)
• The Phlegmatic is easygoing and does things at her own pace.“Whatever. I’m easy.” Slow to anger and slow to judge, the Phlegmatic is also slow to get excited because basically, she hates change. If you want her to do something, you have to give her a good, sound reason. (On Your Mark…You Know, On Second Thought…)

I fit into the fourth category. I often resist change or come around to it very slowly. If you want me to do something new, I need a damned good reason to do it. I’m all about the second thought or the other hand.

My father, my brother and I all were slow to get excited about anything. It drove Mom nuts (she’s the first type on the list). I know my seeming lack of enthusiasm often confuses James (who is probably the second type on the list). Since I don’t take to quick changes, I’ll drag my feet and put off the inevitable for as long as possible.

It sucks.

But, I can change that and so can you. All it takes is modifying those nasty little behavioral patterns. It won’t be easy, but if you want to ever have any hope of succeeding at all, you’ve got to start somewhere.

1. Give yourself credit for a job well done. Go ahead and reward yourself. You deserve it.
2. Stop making excuses for being unsuccessful. No one is stopping you but you, so own it.
3. Seek out genuine feedback, stay away from “yes men” and nay-sayers at all costs. The first type of people give you a false sense of security, and the second type bleed you dry with negativity.
4. See yourself as successful and you will be successful.
5. Remember those who helped you along the way. Always give credit where it’s due.
6. Accept compliments. You earned them.

When you start to recognize the traits that hold you back, you start to learn how to work around them or with them. You’ll see the self-destructive behavior for what it is – and you’ll be able to stop yourself before it gets out of control.

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7 Deadly Fears Explored: Success first appeared on Men with Pens
Copyright 2006 - 2011, All Rights Reserved.

I’ve been thinking for a few days on inadequacy. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s an illusion, much like many other restrictions we place on ourselves.

Inadequacy and rejection seem to go hand in hand. One feeds the other. The more you are rejected, the lower your self-esteem and the more inadequate you feel. The more inadequate you feel, the more you seem to be rejected. It’s one big mind game and the goal to winning is outsmarting yourself.

Ah, but easier said than done.

I think half the battle is recognizing when you’re boxing yourself in with a self-defeatist attitude. I head in that direction when I have a tough graphic design project that keeps coming back to haunt me like a bad penny.

At first I face the revisions with determination. It’s okay; I can make it perfect the second time around. The client will love it.

After the third or fourth attempt at reading a client’s mind and achieving his vision, my resolve begins to wear away like chrome flaking under the jet of a power washer. Although I know my designs or my articles are well above standard, I begin to second-guess myself. The ideas are harder to come by because I’m trying too hard.

When I reach the breaking point on the F**k It scale, the client leaps up. “That’s it! Perfect! I love it!”

Go figure. Such is the Zen of Creativity.

Inadequacy is all about the standards and expectations we set for ourselves. Some of us, like me, have very high standards. We’re our worst critics. Other people don’t expect as much of us than we do of ourselves.

Free your mind and just do what comes naturally. You don’t have to be a Buddhist monk to achieve this state of creative nirvana. Here’s how you can help yourself get over feelings of inadequacy:

• Distance. When you start to feel overwhelmed, take a step back. Sometimes putting distance between you and the problem helps keep it in perspective. Let it sit and come back to it later.
• Life or Death. Most problems are really very small in the greater scheme of things. Think about it: Will it really matter 100 years from now? Probably not. Let go of perfection; it’s not a matter of life or death. That’s not to say you shouldn’t try for perfection from the start; just don’t be disappointed if you don’t achieve it the first time around.
• Now Is The Moment Of Power. Overcoming inadequacy requires you to be “in the moment”. The Hawaiian spiritual philosophy of Huna has one principle called “manawa”, which means that now is the moment of power. Everything you do in this very moment is shaping your reality for the future. When you live in the moment, the worries of the past and the future cease to exist. I know it all sounds like a bunch of hippy-tree-hugging-granola-loving BS, but it’s true.
• Flexibility. The tree that does not bend in the face of the storm breaks. The same goes for you. Trying to fight against pressure, whether it’s from an outside source or within yourself, will only break you. Allow some flexibility and roll with situations.
• Eye Of The Storm. Be the center of the hurricane, stay calm and let the storm around you blow itself out. It can’t go on forever. Even if you have to take shelter in your mental root cellar for an hour or two, do it. You’ll be better off for it.

Overcoming inadequacy takes time. Go easy on yourself. You’re not so bad – honest! You’re human; you’re allowed to make mistakes and have a few imperfections.

Just don’t beat your head against the wall over things you can’t control.

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7 Deadly Fears Explored: Inadequacy first appeared on Men with Pens
Copyright 2006 - 2011, All Rights Reserved.

I admit that I wasn’t too thrilled with the design I had sent him. It wasn’t bad…but it wasn’t good, either. It was just one of those projects where I spent a lot of time trying to outguess a client who has a tendency to be vague to begin with.

The last project I’d done for him was bang on. I thought I had the client’s tastes figured out. Alas, I didn’t. Despite the anticipation of rejection, the blow to the ego was no softer.

Instead of my usual personal tirade, I sat back, took a deep breath and kindly thanked the client.

Yes, that’s right: I thanked him for the rejection.

He’d emailed me vague criticism. “I don’t like it. Try again.” I politely requested he specify me what it was he didn’t like about the design. I told him that knowing what isn’t working for him is as much of a help as knowing what is great.

I was very proud of myself for handling the rejection with the utmost grace and dignity. I didn’t feel stressed out, upset, or angry, or hurt. I felt just fine. It was business as usual.

When the client emailed me the details of his preferences, the list didn’t seem so harsh or critical. He provided me with a long list of what he didn’t like, but that was cool. I was ready for that list and had an open mind.

Hey, I’m learning. So can you:

1. Don’t take rejection personally. As writers and artists, our work is very personal. We draw on events and experiences from deep in our souls and bare them to the world. It’s hard not to take criticism to heart. I’m guilty of often saying, “What’s wrong with this? Can’t the client see this is beautiful?” Detach yourself and realize the criticism has nothing to do with your skills or abilities – unless you really can’t do the job at all.
2. Rejection is like death and taxes: It’s unavoidable. Eventually, it’s going to happen to you. When I first started riding a motorcycle, my friend Pete told me there are two types of riders: those who have dropped their bikes and those who were going to drop their bikes. When you drop that proverbial bike (or fall off the horse), get your ass back up on it.
3. …but you don’t have to get back in the saddle right away. It’s okay to wallow for a little bit if you have to or walk away from the situation to cool down. After you’ve distanced yourself from the issue, it doesn’t seem so bad when you come back for a second look. Don’t let it go for too long, though. Giving yourself time doesn’t mean avoiding dealing with a situation.
4. Ask for clarification and specifics. Open up the lines of communication. Try to see the issues from the other person’s point of view. There are always two sides to every story. Listen calmly and try to keep your emotions out of it.
5. Hiding your writing, art or other projects so no one will ever see your work because you fear rejection and think no one will like it is counter productive. Get your work out there, let people see it, and ask them for feedback. Without feedback, you’ll never improve.

Bo Bennet said it best.

“It is not rejection itself that people fear; it is the possible consequences of rejection. Preparing to accept those consequences and viewing rejection as a learning experience that will bring you closer to success, will not only help you to conquer the fear of rejection, but help you to appreciate rejection itself.”

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7 Deadly Fears of Writing Explored: Rejection first appeared on Men with Pens
Copyright 2006 - 2011, All Rights Reserved.

I picked up a book by Jurgen Wolff called Your Writing Coach at the Blog Expo. Now I finally had a chance to read it. The very first chapter title snared me: No More Fear, No More Excuses. Many creative people often scare themselves out of a good project before they even put a pen to paper. Wolff broke down these fears into seven basic categories:

Fear of Rejection

This is a big fear and the most common. Harboring a fear that no one will like your finished product is enough to stop you dead in your tracks. Rejection happens. You can’t please everyone all the time.

If you keep trying, though, you find one person (or more) who likes your work. Store shelves are lined with the books of famous authors who suffered rejection – look where those authors are now.

The only difference between a winner and a loser isn’t the number of times the person has been rejected. The winner is the one that never gave up.

Fear of Inadequacy

This is a big, big obstacle for me – the fear that nothing you write is good enough. I can’t count the number of times I’ve dragged my feet because I thought to myself, “What do I know about this? Who wants to read what I have to say?”

Apparently, plenty of people. I thought my work was utter crap (and often still do). Clients think it’s almost sheer genius.

Even the critics thought Shakespeare was lousy; 400 years later, Shakespeare’s works are still around and doing well. Just goes to show how much critics know.

Fear of Success

This one sounds like an oxymoron, but many people are afraid of success. I’m pleading the 5th on this one. For some, the thought of everything becoming too big to handle is enough to paralyze them into doing nothing.

The trick is to deal with the situation one step at a time. Worry about success when you get there.

Fear of Revealing Too Much

This was one fear I hadn’t thought of. Looking back over the course of the past, there were times when I wondered if what I wrote did reveal too much of me. I draw a lot from experience. The characters in the novel James and I are working on are very close to my heart. I wondered whether family and friends who read the book would see right through the characters – and see me.

As writers, we often bare our souls. This works for you and against you. You’ll run up against people who disagree with you, but on the other hand, you might end up touching your readers deeply.

Fear of Having Only One Book in You

Finally! One fear I don’t suffer from. I have enough material stockpiled to write at least a dozen novels in a dozen different series.

Many writers aren’t that fortunate.

Realize that you are a writer, that you have stories to tell. You will always have stories to tell. Some may take longer than others to unwind, but those tales in you are waiting to come out.

Fear You’re Too Old

Bah. You’re never too old. With age comes experience. Experience adds depth to your writing. Age adds an element of maturity to any work. A novel requires patience. Think about it – patience is something a young writer might lack.

Fear of Too Much Research

Details are important in a novel. You have to know the period in which the story is set, the details of characters’ occupations, the nuances of different cultures, and so on. Even Details make the story believable. Gene Roddenberry, the creator of Star Trek, based much of his science fiction in science fact.

Enjoy the research. Learn about your characters and the world they live in. If you’re writing articles, blogs, or ebooks on non-fiction, enjoy learning about something new. Don’t consider learning a job; it’s a pastime and a hobby for many writers. So, how does a writer overcome these seven deadly fears? By facing them, of course.

Read Jurgen Wolff’s book, too. I highly recommend it. Or even better, get a writing coach to help you work through your fears and get back to great writing you enjoy.

(Hey, I just said I’d share the fears with you. What you do about them is up to you.)

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7 Deadly Fears of Writing – Part 1 of 8 first appeared on Men with Pens
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