Happy Upcoming Mother’s Day, everyone! We’re a day early, but we wanted to have something special this weekend for Mother’s Day. Harry invited his mom, Eileen, to write a guest post for us.
My son Harry, who writes for a living, has solicited me to write about my writing experiences.
I was not as fortunate as my child to have had genes that made writing a natural art. I must tell you that writing was not a skill I acquired until I was an adult.
In fact, I never really understood the ins and outs of the English language until my senior year of high school, when I was lucky enough to have a wonderful teacher who finally made writing easier for me to grasp.
My first adventure with writing came was when I was dating the man who would one day marry me and become the father of my children.
When he and I first met, being introduced by mutual friends, we fell in love. He was in the Navy stationed out of state and I was an infant technician working at a local hospital in New York.
He was home on leave when we had our first and second dates. On our second date, he asked me to have dinner with him at his parents’ home and then see him off to return to duty.
The reason I am telling you this story is because we were apart most of our courtship and used pen and paper along with the telephone to get to know each other. I found out that he had graduated from college with a BA in English Literature, which to me meant that my letters should contain the best grammar and spelling I could muster up.
I worked the afternoon shift and used my downtime writing letters to “my sailor”. I used to do draft after draft before the final copy to ensure that the language and spelling were correct.
Once the drafts were adequate, I would place the writing paper on top of lined paper so that the sentences would be straight on the page. Every letter was written in this manner. It was so important to me to appear educated since, after all, my sailor was a college graduate with a degree.
We wrote continuously for 1 ½ years before we married, seeing each other only 30 days – in 10 day spurts – from the first time we met to the day of our wedding. Writing played a huge part in developing the loving and caring relationship we had and still have almost 44 years later.
Once married and having reared 2 children who had grown up enough to handle themselves responsibly without me there constantly, it was time for me to venture out into the working world.
Granted, I had worked off and on while the children were young but had suffered a bout of agoraphobia for two years. I never left home without my husband taking me wherever I wanted to go. I finally felt confident enough to began looking for a career.
Over time, I found a job with a Fortune 500 company and decided that the only way I could better myself would be to take some courses at the local state college after work. I decided to take a writing class that was combined with public speaking.
Our first assignment was to write about something that influenced our lives a great deal. When that was completed, we would all have the opportunity to present our papers in front of the class and conduct a question-and-answer period.
I chose to write about my experience with agoraphobia and titled my paper “Always Leave Home without It”.
The title came from the fear I had about going out into the public, the fear of driving by myself, the fear of being by myself, and the fear of dying. They were the most horrible years of my life and I am sure they were for my family, too, but they stood by me.
I can honestly say today that if they had not, I wouldn’t be writing this article.
From this course, I took away a feeling of confidence in myself and improved my writing skills. I worked myself up in the company, and my last position was that of the administrative assistant for a senior vice president (who left the task of composing thank-you notes and other mundane correspondence to me).
The tricky thing about this was that when I wrote, I had to make the contents of the letter sound as if it was coming sincerely from a man. I guess I succeeded because he always signed them.
Over the years, I used my writing skills in every facet of my life. Putting into words what you feel in your heart is very gratifying. It gives you great self-esteem and hopefully gives others pleasure.
Thanks, Mom – from both us Boys.
What a lovely story, and so nice for this special weekend. My mother is the biggest champion of my writing and reads every blog post I ever write, every article I ever publish … perhaps it’s time for her to guest post for me too =)
BTW, I’d be really interested to know what Harry’s father thought about these letters. I hope he appreciated all the effort that went into them! They obviously had the intended effect, of course.
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Thanks for sharing that beautiful story, Eileen. It’s a wonderful reminder of the power of words. The ability to move someone with writing is one of the many reasons that I love my job so much.
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to the christian, john wrote this: 1Jn 4:18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear has punishment; and the one fearing has not been perfected in love.
it is beautiful.
Eileen,
What a beautiful article. The care and crafting of your handwritten words carried you to some wonderful places. That’s a great reminder in a day when hand writing anything is nearly a lost art.
After you had been the support of your family for so many years, I’m so glad your family was strong for you when you needed them most; not so you could come write this story, but so you can continue to “write” your own story. It’s inspiring reading about how you were able to push past your fears.
Love letters are the best kind of writing. Meticulous love letters? You are my kind of lady.
Happy Mother’s Day, Mrs. McLeod.
Regards,
Kelly
P.S. I always wanted to tell you: Harrison Connor McLeod is (next to my daughter’s) the most lovely name anyone has ever come up with for a baby. You have a wonderfully creative bent. Lucky Harry!
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Dear Harry and James,
What a lovely, lovely thing to do.
Eileen,
Thank you for the grace of your words. Power strength, love, and care all clearly show through. You have the most fortunate of gifts.
I love letters. So I make a point to write them too. And I love to pick out the stamps. It’s that moment at the mailbox when a personal note is spied among the rest of the clutter… that smile, a little mystery, the anticipation.. a look at the address…one of my favorite things actually…and the savoring of it.
Note to self…get out my address book, see who’s turn it is.
Thanks for the reminder. And Happy Mother’s Day.
All best,
Jan
Janice C Cartier’s last blog post..Long Shots
Eileen, thank you. A beautiful story.
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What a lovely story. It made me smile this early in the morning.
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Eilleen,
Happy Mother’s day! From one to another! My post on Mother’s day is a gift to all mothers, check it out if you have a second, I would love to honor you with it, just as you have honored me with your beautiful words.
You have a raised a wonderful son- who chooses his friends well. You can be proud of that. and…you writing is beautiful. I just asked Harry yesterday if his parents were writers, because I told him his name was so perfect it seemed as if it came out of a novel.
Harry and James,
This is a wonderful post to wake up to. As a mother, it warms my heart when I see sons think of things like this. Further polishing your image of coolness my delightful Pen Men…
well done.
Wendi Kelly’s last blog post..A Mother’s Gratitude
Eileen,
What a wonderful and well written story. Thank you for sharing it here, and may you have a Happy Mother’s Day.
(Harry & James, thank you for this today.)
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post..canada 2, greece 0. a story about running.
Hi Eileen,
Thank you for sharing your very personal and moving story. It’s amazing how much love ignites us to learn and grow. I am inspired by your story and the power of words. Your ending resonated…
“Putting into words what you feel in your heart is very gratifying. It gives you great self-esteem and hopefully gives others pleasure.”
Very gratifying indeed.
Beautifully written Eileen!
I can certainly see where Harry gets his talent and determination.
I love the way that you wove writing through your entire story. I certainly agree with you that writing something that can be used in every facet of life.
(In fact, I just left a comment to that effect on someone else’s blog before reading this.)
It’s been nice to “meet” you and hear your story.
Laura Spencer’s last blog post..Are You A Writer Who Blogs, or a Blogger Who Writes?
@ Everyone: I just got off the phone with Mom. She’s going to try to stop by later to answer all your comments. Mom was thrilled that all of you left such lovely comments. Thank you.
@Amanda: Knowing my Dad, he appreciated them very much.
@Sharon: That’s one of the reasons I love my job so much too.
@Jansie: Very deep words there, I’ll be contemplating them the rest of the day
@Kelly: I knew you’d like Mom, she’s a Cappy too.
@Janice: Handwritten letters are becoming a lost art. It’s good to break out the pen and paper from time to time and just drop someone a line.
@Milena & Kris: Smiles are good too, glad you enjoyed the post.
@Wendi: I told Mom what you said and she laughed and said that Dad takes the credit for that one.
@Brett: You’re welcome!
@Stephanie: It is gratifying when you know you’ve reached out and touched your readers.
This is beyond wonderful. Harry you are a very fortunate man. Eileen we adore your son.
Janice C Cartier’s last blog post..Long Shots
Harry,
I almost guessed that out loud, but then thought that was taking the Signs a bit too far to assume that only we Capricorns put lined paper under our handwritten notes (yes, me too, Mrs. McLeod!).
You’re a lucky dude.
Regards,
Kelly
Kelly’s last blog post..Inspiration Points: No Regrets!
Update from Mom:
Yup, everyone will still be here tomorrow, no rush. We all look forward to hearing from you.
How wonderful. How romantic.
Well Harrison, having a wonderful Mom explains why you are one of the good guys.
Thank you for sharing her with us for the day
Wonderful story from Eileen! I love the title of the agorophobia story!
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Eileen, it sounds like you had a romantic courtship. I love the idea of writing letters back and forth. Real letters on real paper with real ink. Do you have a box full of those letters?
Thanks, Harry & James, for posting this. It’s good to hear the story of one of the women behind the Men with Pens.
Ellen, it is simply wonderful to read your story. Words are indeed powerful enough to create love and erase fear. I’ve never heard it put that way before, and I love it. Happy Mother’s day!
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I believe mothers are our inner compasses; we’re all benefiting from Eillen’s part in pointing Harry towards writing! Writing from the heart is cathartic & always enjoyable when done as soulfully as this. Thank you, Eileen, for sharing yourself (& for your son ~_^).. Like Amanda, I hope to follow suit w/a guest post from my mum one day. She makes everything I write inherently worthwhile & her comments on my blog are some of the most thought-provoking. Words are powerful & a mother’s words make a world of difference. May we all change our worlds w/honest words!?
(|_|*TO MOTHERS*|_|)
“All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother.†~ Abraham Lincoln
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@Dorian: Coffeesister! I’ve heard so much about you, thank you for stopping by. Mothers are our inner compasses and whether my mom realizes it or not, I inherited quite a lot from her.
That was a lovely story. Thanks for sharing it with us! My husband and I fell in love through writing to each other too.
I had a bout of mini-agoraphobia for a few years too. It was when I first moved to Spain from the U.S. and I didn’t speak much Spanish. I was scared to go out because I was worried that someone would try to talk to me. My husband had to go with me everywhere.
I feel that writing is a big weakness for me. I don’t do as many blog posts as I would like. I do okay with spelling and grammar, but I always feel boring! You make me feel inspired to share more.
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Eileen, your story is inspiring. Not only writing to learn about each other, but the care you put into those letters. Everything seems to be so rushed these days. I’m guessing most people don’t give an email a second look before they send it, much less take the time to send a handwritten note. Happy Mother’s Day!