How to Spam Yourself to Success

How to Spam Yourself to Success

Ladies and gentlemen, I have done it. I have found the ultimate secret to success. The magic bullet, if you will. It’s a precise method that takes you from where you are now (nowhere) to where you want to be (pool side, surrounded by beautiful individuals and sipping on something that’ll get you very intoxicated).

Best of all, you won’t have to pay $997 for some bloated ebook + video course that takes 40 million hours to get through and bores you half to death.

Before I enlighten you on this amazing method, let me ask you something: Do you know why you haven’t already reached the success you seek?

  • It’s not because you’re lazy (although some of you are).
  • It’s not because you don’t know how (how-to products are more common than Oprah re-runs).
  • It’s not because you don’t have the time (if you truly want something, you’ll make the damn time!)
  • It’s not that you don’t have the passion (why else do you slave away 16 hours a day?)

The real reason you haven’t yet achieved success is because you haven’t clearly defined what success means to you. And you don’t keep your eye on the prize.

For example: Let’s say one week you define success by owning a Ferrari. Then the next week you wish for a mansion. The week after that you want to fly around in your own private jet, flush with your own service tending staff and the finest cook money can buy.

Well, I can pretty much guarantee you’ll never achieve any of these goals. Ever.

Why? Well first of all, you don’t even know what you want. Your success wish list jumps around more frequently than a kid playing hopscotch. Second, you don’t have a firm grip on your definition of success.

There is nothing wrong with material prizes as a definition of success. Just make damn sure that if you want to own a Ferrari, then you have an income stream that sustains the sort of lifestyle where you can drive around in one. And driving around in a Ferrari requires a very different income stream than flying around in a private jet. So does owning a mansion. It’s not a matter of aiming low or aiming high; that’s nonsense. It’s a matter of aiming, then locking on to the target.

So “success” should really mean “an income stream that sustains the lifestyle I desire.”

Here’s the good part: I know a method of achieving such success, and it’s practically foolproof.

  1. First, define the prize you’d like to have. Pick one – and only one. Not ten.
  2. Then, figure out how much income you need to achieve that prize and sustain it.

Let’s say you’d like a Ferrari. A used F430 costs around $170,000. Maintenance and gas for one is usually around $10,000 a year. Insurance has too many variables (such as your credit rating, accident history etc.) so we’ll leave that out for now. So you’d need a total sum of $220,000 to buy and sustain your Ferrari for 5 years.

Now take this goal, and divide it down to a monthly amount. So $220k works out to $18,333 per month. Now divide this further into a weekly goal, which works out to $4,583. That last step is mucho important – you need small, achievable steps in order to succeed.

So how will you make $4,583 per week? Well, being the savvy entrepreneur that you are, it’s highly likely that you’re going to have to sell stuff. Awesome stuff. If you don’t have stuff to sell, then do whatever it takes to create a valuable product to sell.

I want you to look at the products or services you provide. For the sake of simplicity, let’s say you have product A priced at $97 and product B priced at $197 and you want each of these products to make up 50% of your weekly goal. This means 23 copies of product A and 12 copies of product B. That equates to 3 sales per day of product A and about 2 sales per day of product B.

Think about that for a second. Is it really that hard to sell 2 copies of your high end product on a daily basis? That’s nothing. It’s so easily achievable it should be a joke. You should be laughing right now. But that’s not even the best part.

Here is where things get really good. Sign up for a newsletter service and create an autoresponder email list called Success Goal. Add your own email to this list – make sure it’s your main email, the one you check most often.

Next, set up 24 auto responders that you’ll send to yourself. 12 will be used to help you keep your eye on the prize, and the other 12 will be used to help you keep tabs on your small, achievable income goal steps.

Write two emails to send to yourself. You’ll copy/paste one in the Eye-On-The-Prize autoresponders and copy/paste the second in your Income Steps autoresponders. Set your system up to send the first autoresponder bi-weekly and the second autoresponder on a weekly basis.

Here’s an example of what you might write to yourself for the bi-weekly Eye-On-The-Prize email:

Title: Hey you cupcake, this is what you wanted to achieve

Dear Future Self,

On [date], you decided that achieving a Ferrari would be your ultimate symbol of success. Every action you take should help you move closer towards that goal. Look at what you’re doing – if it’s not helping you move closer, then stop immediately and get back on course.

Remember the initial excitement you felt when you thought about this goal. Visualize what it would feel like if – right now – you were driving around in that Ferrari. Don’t let go of this vision.

  • If people try to throw you off track, show them your middle finger.
  • If people get in your way, run them over.
  • If you encounter huge obstacles, find a way around them.

Your goal is to get that Ferrari. Keep your eyes on the prize and pat yourself on the arse, because you rock.


Your second, weekly autoresponder should look something like this:

Title: Your end of the week goal – $4,583

Dear Future Self,

By the end of today, you should have made 35 sales or have banked $4583. If you did, then congratulations! By the end of the year, you’ll have that Ferrari in your driveway, just like you wanted.

If you didn’t manage to hit your goal, then there’s something wrong. Increase your marketing, increase your conversions, or seek help so you can reach your targeted sales goals. Do whatever it takes!

Because if this keeps up, you’ll end up with mere chump change by the end of the year… just like every other average Joe.

You’re not average. Average doesn’t cut it. Thousands of people have Ferraris, and you can have one too. All you have to do is take the right action.

By next week, you should have $9,166  in your bank account. If you let yourself down, how will you set an example for others?

Wipe the dust off your shoulders, pick yourself up and back on the horse you go. HIYA!


How perfect is that? Obviously your emails will be based on whatever prize and/or goals you’ve figured out, but the point is that the method works.

I used this very method to increase my client base by 100% and reduce my workload by about 50%. My ultimate success goal was the 100% increase in paying clients, which I achieved. My short-term goals were to increase my marketing efforts and create more template-type content I could customize in minutes instead of hours.

So be creative, and get cracking. The experts already tell you to set up autoresponders to stay in touch with your potential customers and get them to take action, so why wouldn’t you use this technique on yourself?

One thing I’ve realized is that knowing marketing psychology doesn’t make you immune to it… so instead of falling for other people’s hoopla, fall for your own. It’ll put money in your pocket instead of theirs. And if you found this method useful, consider putting money in my pocket. I won’t mind. I’ll even give some to James.

Here’s to brainwashing yourself to success.

Post by Fitjerk

While he has a passion for writing and oozes the entrepreneurial spirit,FJ is a fitness expert first and foremost, focusing on impeccably accurate advice. To read more of his ramblings, check out his fitness blog.

Join the Discussion. Click Here to Leave a Comment.

  1. James,

    I think this is one of your very, very best, funniest and most practical posts. I’ve loved them all, but this one takes the (cup) cake.

    Thank you!


  2. Darn. I was vaguely hoping someone in a shiny Ferrari would drive up and say, ” Hey buddy, you look like a decent sort of fellow. I’m tired of all the envious looks I get driving this car. I’m done with it. Here’s the keys…”

  3. Fitjerk,

    Fun and engaging writing, excellent advice–but I really hope everyone spends their energy and passion on something more important than getting a fancy car.

    • The car itself is arbitrary. Just a mere example… you can substitute the car for your kid’s college fund, vacation, business investment, whatever the hell it is that tingles your underside. This works for material things and non-material things equally.

  4. The whole time I was reading this, I thought it was a Frank Kern spoof, and kept waiting for the punchline.

  5. Yeah, but you forgot the tax man’s bite.

  6. Awesome tip and fun way to get to the point. I could use a good email kick in the pants like this!

  7. In addition to laughing out loud, I have to say my fav part of your post was the suggestion that the tools and strategies we use to keep our customers in the sales funnel could be the same tools and strategies we use to keep ourselves on track. Great way to put it in perspective. *thumbs up*

  8. Really enjoyed it Fitjerk. Something about automating self-monitoring is a really cool idea. Definitely getting implemented in 2012.

  9. Ha! Brilliant! Going to go think up a really kick-butt goal and start spamming myself.

  10. Knowing my future self, he’d probably send me to the spam folder. Grrrrrr.

  11. OMGoodness! What a crazy awesome idea! I would have never thought to use my newsletter to spam myself, but you are so right. Over time we may forget about our big goal…the thing we’re working so hard for or we may get side tracked, but having these frequent emails will help us remember exactly why we’re doing what we’re doing. I’m scheduling this into my planner right now! Thanks so much FJ!

  12. Just bravo.


    I love the style of this writing, the conversational tone throughout the whole post, and it’s very great insight.

    Well played.

  13. Just when I started to think 1shop was awesome for keeping in touch with clients, you give out one more use. I’m playing with this now.

  14. Just simply brilliant. This also reminded me of making a copyright proof by sending your own MSS to yourself by email lol

  15. Gotta say, I never, ever would have thought of this myself! Forwarding to a friend now.

  16. What an absolutely brilliant idea! Yes it’s funny and all, but besides all that, psyching your own self out to succeed, using the same techniques you use to move others into action, can’t be a bad idea. In fact, the basic concept is universally applicable to just about any idea or business concept that requires consistent, concerted action. If you take this one step further, you can get each member of a mastermind group to hold themselves accountable to themselves and each other for productivity. Of course, I’m just thinking aloud at the moment and this will take considerable tweaking. But after the dust settles, methinks you have laid the foundation for a concept that can make success go viral! Gonna take a sabbatical to go bring all my thoughts together and keep you guys posted.

  17. Wow, finally the magic bullet. But it’s still a process, though. Who said success would be too easy? Heh

    Thanks for the good read. Enjoy your holiday season!


  1. […] How to Spam Yourself to Success (Okay, so it’s an odd-sounding headline, but really, check the post out! Some great ideas.) […]

  2. […] How to Spam Yourself to Success (Okay, so it’s an odd-sounding headline, but really, check the post out! Some great ideas.) […]

  3. […] How to Spam Yourself to Success (Okay, so it’s an odd-sounding headline, but really, check the post out! Some great ideas.) […]

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