Website Copy With Benefits: Tei’s Take
So here’s the thing: people are stupid.
Not you, of course. No. You are quite intelligent, attractive, generally delightful people. I wouldn’t dream of calling you stupid. It’s all those other people. The stupid people. Those idiots.
Sorry. I had a bit of a morning. You see, James was trying to explain to me for the half-a-zillionth time about writing benefits into marketing copy. I was railing up and down that I had put benefits in the copy. He was saying that I was wrong, which, incidentally, is about the least helpful thing you can say to a ranting rogue who knows she’s right.
I mean, come now, people. Am I not always right?
Exactly.
Benefits works like this: You say, I have an awesome product. The reader says yeah, sure, so what? I don’t need no stinkin’ product. I have plenty of products. Most of them are for my hair. Don’t judge me; I have combination scalp.
And you say, but my product is the awesomest product ever. And the reader says yawn.
So you say, my product will make your combination scalp go bye-bye forever!
Now, this is usually where I, like a sensible person, stop writing. The person has a problem. I have given them a solution to the problem. For me, my selling can pretty much stop there. Because everyone can put together problem + solution = awesome, can they not?
According to James, no. No, they cannot. Which is where I start to rant about stupid people.
Stupid people need to be told why awesome things are good for them. Instead of just saying that their problem will be solved, you need to spell it out for them (like you would to a three-year-old) why solving the problem is a good thing.
“Honey, having no combination scalp means that your hair will be shiny and luscious and then menfolk will ask you out on dates and you’ll turn down most of them because let’s face it, the kind of men who are swayed by shiny hair are not exactly the cream of the crop, but wouldn’t it be nice to have that rush of power that comes from rejecting someone? Yes it would. So go ahead and buy the product. It will be awesome.”
At which point, the stupid person says, “Wait, why will it be awesome again?”
Which is about when I start to tear my hair out. But it is also when James would say that you explain it again. Slowly. Patiently. With enthusiasm. It is not unlike selling a child on the idea of a trip to the zoo. You know they’ll have the time of their life when they get there, but making it sound like a good proposition in the first place takes some effort.
Not that three-year-olds are stupid. Not that YOUR three-year-old is stupid. I’m sure your three-year-old is reading at a first-grade level already. I’m just saying that I am always baffled by how much you really need to dumb down your marketing materials.
Apparently, when it comes to copywriting, we really are going for the lowest common denominator. Your three-year-old. Not that your three-year-old isn’t great. I’m sure that he is. I have a three-year-old goddaughter myself. She is awesome.
But if I have to explain to her why she’s awesome when she gets to be my age in the same slow, careful enthusiasm as I have to explain matters in website copy, I may disown her. She is duly warned.
Tune in on Friday, when you’ll be able to read all about benefits in website copy from James’ perspective – which is, we’ll note, not quite that of a three-year-old.
36 Responses to “Website Copy With Benefits: Tei’s Take”
Comments
Read below or add a comment...
Go ahead. Leave a Comment!
-
Affiliate Program
-
James Is Reading…
-
Social Hookups
As Seen In…
Overheard on the Web
MwP is Powered by…
So was James being bossy again? I mean, firm, gotta be PC here! LOL!
I was trying to explain this to a client just yesterday. She knows her products and services inside out, to her the benefits are blindingly obvious. When she says she does ‘X’ she assumes the customer understands this means A, B & C. Ummm, no. They don’t. You need to spell it out. Clearly. Simply. Specifically.
Customers don’t want the features, they want the end results and good feeling emotions to go with it.
Love your work Tei! And I’m looking forward to James’ perspective on this on Friday!
Melinda´s last blog post…Seven Facts About Me (That Most People Don’t Know)
Always spell it out, and then some, and then some more.
With a little added explanation for good measure.
Amy Harrison´s last blog post…Copywriting Basics For New Websites
I’m so with you on this on Tei. Problem + solution = yay! buy!
But people aren’t so much stupid as obtuse and distracted. It’s like talking to a guy who’s in the middle of a football game – you’re not going to get a response unless you’re jumping up and down topless – during the commercial.
Okay, James, having just come up with analogy, I finally get it. It’s not just a matter of capturing attention – it’s capturing attention at the right moment with the right amount of excitement or the 20 million other shiny objects will distract potential buyers.
Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome´s last blog post…Fear of an office job: Allison Day interview
@ Alex – Wrong. It’s helping people see the future. “If you buy this/hire me/use this, this is what your life will be like. [enter gleaming description here]”
And please. Alex. Bro. I love you. But put your shirt back on and siddown, will you?
@ Amy – Spell it out… and keep it short, concise and to the point.
@ Melinda – Not bossy! Firm! Discriminating! Expert!
For the record, we’ll note that using, “Wrong” is, in fact, a response I picked up from an individual fond and dear to my heart. I was on the receiving end of it quite a few times myself, actually. So my use of it is just that I was a very good student.
EH, TEI?
This post reminds me of the conversations I have with myself regarding the benefits of exercise. I read articles about it, experience it, and yet still question it. When I do eventually get there (just like going to the zoo) I’m happy. I knew all this from the beginning. It’s all rather stupid but sometimes that’s the path I must follow to get there.
Tei,
I feel for you. Really I do. James is a stubborn one, and darned if he isn’t frequently wise and correct to boot. ‘Taint fair at all.
Alex,
The only thing we women (statistically speaking) watch is the commercials. Therefore, we can not be tasked with jumping up and down topless to get attention at that time.
James,
Bombarded. Alex is right on that. If we go way back, say 120 years, you didn’t have to sell the bennies. Problem + solution = Yay. because there were fewer messages, and solutions you didn’t come up with on your own were nil, so if somebody else had a solution, it was Wow!
Real quickly, the world became full of solutions. If you fast forward about 30 years, say around the 20s, the ads lining a magazine or a newspaper have changed entirely. Benefits or back-section classifieds, because they had to stand out from the seven other solutions for the same problem.
Psychologicalally, sure, helping people see the future is why you do it, but why they need you to do it, is because “We Solve Your Problem” is the same thing every other Joe in town will say now.
IMO.
Regards,
Kelly
Kelly´s last blog post…Inspiration Points: The Brick & Mortars Our Nations Are Built On
This is my stumbling block with copywriting. As a programmer I subscribed heavily to the D.R.Y principle (Don’t Repeat Yourself) now I have to repeat myself ad nauseum.
Oh and there’s another stumbling block; ad nauseum is a great phrase but not simple enough for copywriting. Whereas “normal” writing sees me reaching for a thesaurus, writing compelling copy requires the thing be declared the spawn of all things evil.
Yet like a geek and his new TaunTaun sleeping bag I must have more! (All things copywriting I mean, not more sleeping bags. I didn’t fit into the first one. Small adult my ar…)
Great post Tei. Looking forward to James’ “perfect” perspective on Friday.
Marc – WelshScribe´s last blog post…The Secret to Successful Networking
See, it isn’t that I can’t see the value of explaining benefits. But when my target market is people that wake up every morning bemoaning the fact that they don’t have my solution, WHY must I explain to them why it’s great to have my solution?
I get it when you didn’t know you wanted my solution. I am totally on board with that concept. When you’re loafing about blissfully unaware that my solution can change your life, it makes TOTAL sense that you need to be explained why my solution will rock your world.
But if you’ve been whining about needing this solution for months, I don’t expect to need to sell you on it. I already know you want it. Can we not assume that you want it because you already think it will make your life awesome? Why do I need to tell you that?
Alex – I know that analogy. I’m with you. But getting a guy’s attention during a football game should not be hard if you have something you know that he wants. If I holler at the football guy that he could be getting laid in the other room, I do not expect to have to explain to football guy that sex is a good thing. I’m just sayin’. If the guy needs that explained to him, he’s never going to be getting any.
Jamie-boy – I have not the faintest idea what you’re talking about. Of course, I rarely do.
Kelly – Yet another explanation of why Tei was born in the wrong time era.
Marc – Yes. Simplicity will make you a slave.
A + B =C=$
or A + B = xy ^^ +
=$
Hm…can’t wait to find out why.
That either makes sense or I am just very fond of making pictures…
Janice Cartier´s last blog post…Mark Twain’s Guide To Life
And James, you insist that yes I do get marketing? Ha!
(And I thought I’d finally gotten it. {sigh})
Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome´s last blog post…Banish Fear Through Community
@ Alex – I meant the overall concept. Not the nitty gritty
@ Tei – Uh huh. You keep on thinkin’ that, hon.
@ Janice – No painting?
@ Marc – Incorrect. If you have to repeat yourself, you weren’t clear. Repetition does not a benefit create. It just gets redundant
James Chartrand – Men with Pens´s last blog post…Website Copy With Benefits: Tei’s Take
I got quite used to that kind of writing/speaking when I was a teacher.
The first few years I was REALLY PISSED that I had to repeat myself so often. “Why don’t they just get it the FIRST TIME!!?!?!”
Then I realized that everybody’s brain is wired a bit differently and you need to repeat and rephrase so you’re sure you hit everyone, not just the people who think like you.
The hardest part is hiding the rephrasing so the smart(er) people don’t get peeved at all the repetition. There’s an art to that!
Geek’s Dream Girl´s last blog post…National Online Dating Examiner Highlights
James,
What you can’t see all the moustaches I painted on the avatars?
Although I thought Marc looked up to mischief so I swished a red goatee on his chin.
Janice Cartier´s last blog post…Mark Twain’s Guide To Life
@James – I didn’t mean word for word repetition. Like E said, rephrasing it, coming up with a different angle or analogy, explaining it again. Which is actually written into the post:
Is that not by definition repeating yourself?
@Janice get a bigger brush I’m really getting mischievous now
Great points in the article. We are often too familiar with our product to make it that obvious to readers.
But that is not why I am commenting here. I just wanted to say that, yes, my 3 year does read at a 1st grade level!
Bradford Shimp´s last blog post…20 Alternative Tools for New Consultants
Hm, hold still…okay …there ya go.. it has highlights now…
Bet you that early adopters don’t need as much copy. As much selling. Just a thought, but I wonder if anyone has broken that down. Or do we all want the dance , the picture making?
Janice Cartier´s last blog post…Mark Twain’s Guide To Life
This has been the most entertaining blog post I have read in a long time. Thank you very much!
Oh and, no, your readers aren’t stupid. But they are incredibly busy and easily distracted and guilt ridden about using their credit card – again. So the easier you can make it for them to decide to buy, the better.
Lexi Rodrigo´s last blog post…Finding Your Freelancing Field
Tei, do not ever compete with sports. I’m sure you are wonderful, however if you put yourself up between a sports fanatic and the tv, you will lose. Sorry hun, I understand what you’re saying but…… it won’t work. And don’t ask me how I know this…
James said something very good last night on Twitter about this (benefits that is, not Tei), he said that the customer needs to be feeling “I want to say YES! That’s it! I want to so bad I can taste it.” (sorry if you were going to use this in your post James). That statement really made it clear to me.
I was looking at a new Coach’s website this morning, it’s a beautiful site. She’s hugely qualified. I’m sure she does great work. But her website lists all the features and nothing about what it’s going to do for the client. On every page I was thinking “So what? What’s in it for me?” It was a real eye-opener.
Melinda´s last blog post…Monthly Book Giveaway – “Purple Cow†and “The Dip†by Seth Godin
Just throwing a few more thoughts into this:
In Tei’s getting laid analogy, why would the guy want it right then? What’s the urgency? Sports is on NOW – he can get the other almost anytime and definately afterwards. Priorities and sports wins again.
The other thing is the difference between marketing and selling. Selling is when someone knows exactly what they need and which one. And they go and buy it. They’re the one’s who’ll scroll straight through long sales pages and ignore everything while they look for the Buy Now button. Or walk into the car yard and tell the dealer exactly what car, which model and what options. Done deal (after the haggling over price).
Marketing on the other hand, is convincing someone that YOUR product is precisely what they need, the answer to their specific problem (that they may not be aware that they have), that will change their entire life for ever.
If a person wakes up every morning grumbling about their combination scalp – they go shopping. And they see millions of different products that all claim to fix combination scalp. So which one do they choose? They’re going to choose the one that they can visualise “your hair will be shiny and luscious and then menfolk will ask you out on dates” and that makes them smile “wouldn’t it be nice to have that rush of power that comes from rejecting someone? Yes it would.” because they then feel good about that product. And then they finally buy it.
Melinda´s last blog post…Monthly Book Giveaway – “Purple Cow†and “The Dip†by Seth Godin
Melinda,
That reminds me of a story. Is it late enough at night to send the train off the track just a little?
Once, there was a woman. A hotblooded young woman. Yes, she was my Mom, never mind that. This woman wanted to get a man’s attention during a football game. Yes, that was Dad. Who else?
I’d like to tell you it was a big game, but this was the 70s. The Golden Age. To Dad, back then, they were all big ones.
This issue was Very Important. No one has ever been able to remember what it was, but it was Very Important. We know that.
She decided to take one of their dishes and smash it down the back staircase for attention-getting effect. She needed to discuss the Very Important Thing, NOW.
Not getting the effect she wanted—attention!!!—she smashed another. And another…
We ate on paper plates for two months. Dad never noticed that, either. Finally, Mom got new dishes, and whatever it was, I’m gonna guess it never got resolved.
And they lived happily ever after. They celebrated their 41st anniversary last month.
Wait, wait, I can bring it back around to the point.
She wanted his attention so bad that *she* could taste it. But that’s the wrong way around—a desperate seller is not a good salesperson. Whatever she was selling, Dad didn’t want it at all. Eating on nice dishes was not a benefit that Dad cared about, and it wasn’t relevant to the sale at hand anyway.
So…
Don’t bug guys during their favorite sport. Tee hee hee.
I’m going, I’m going…
Later,
Kelly
Kelly´s last blog post…Inspiration Points: The Brick & Mortars Our Nations Are Built On
Oh gosh Kelly, that’s hilarious! I hope your mum bought some really nice, extremely expensive new plates! You know, my DH would be the same. He wouldn’t notice what he ate off as long as it was edible. I suspect he’d notice if I started smashing plates though, because I doubt I’d smash them on the back stairs….
Melinda´s last blog post…Monthly Book Giveaway – “Purple Cow†and “The Dip†by Seth Godin
I think the sex analogy has gone to a weird place all of a sudden here, but I would like to point out that no matter how big of a sports fan, most guys are highly aware that insulting the source of their regular lay is a bad call. The assumption Melinda makes is that the guy can get laid after the sports. If you’re the sort of woman who’s going to insist on offering sex in the middle of your guy’s big game, I’m going to say you’re the sort of woman who’ll make him sleep on the couch for a week in punishment for not jumping to.
I do, however, take the point that being even awesomer than every other awesome on the market involves being different-awesome, and solving the same problem every other product solves is not different-awesome enough. I’m with you there.
But bringing it back to the sports/sex analogy, if you promise that guy something he’s been asking after for months if he drops the game right this second, you may just win that argument. Don’t ask me how I know that, either.
LOLOL! Good comeback Tei!
And you’re right!
Melinda´s last blog post…Monthly Book Giveaway – “Purple Cow†and “The Dip†by Seth Godin
Wonderful writing and an perfect example of why I HATE writing copy too!
‘course, I had to go in all out silliness for April Fools myself, and blend in the best of Make Moola and Lose Weight Hype Copy for my own, ahem, excursion into The Writing Abyss…
Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach´s last blog post…Rainbows follow ME in search of GOLD – Make Money and Lose Weight
Barbara, your post nearly made my eyes bleed, what with all that yellow highlighter and all. And the Buy Now buttons aren’t working right, how do I give you my wallet?????
Melinda´s last blog post…Monthly Book Giveaway – “Purple Cow†and “The Dip†by Seth Godin
I prefer to see it as Yay – Problem = Solution.
Hi Melinda! Those Buy Now buttons should take you to the INCREDIBLE ONE TIME OFFER THAT WILL NEVER EVER EVER BE REPEATED!!!
It didn’t? Wah! But admit it, you adored the rainbow chasing me picture!
Thanks for stopping by, Barbara
Barbara Ling, Virtual Coach´s last blog post…Rainbows follow ME in search of GOLD – Make Money and Lose Weight
Hey, when my daugther was three, she could read at a first grade level, and now she’s got her English degree and going for her Master’s in Woman’s Studies.
I just wonder what type of job she’ll get, but she’s happy. That’s the important thing…………………:)
LisaNewton´s last blog post…World Storytelling Day, a Contest, and your Neighbors
Tei, this is super fantastic. We don’t normally see stuff like this on Men with Pens (er, Chicks with Bics?), and while it may have been a risk (aren’t Pen People supposed to get this stuff?), it was great to know I’m not the only one who thinks this way.
I even think just problem + solution is overkill. Don’t tell me my problem, because I already know it. Don’t tell me your solution, because I won’t believe you. Just tell me the features, and I’ll decide for myself.
However, if people want to be treated like 3 year olds, we can go ahead and do that, even if we don’t understand why.
Hunter Nuttall´s last blog post…The Complete Akashic Records
Hunter – That’s exactly what I’m saying. I just left a big long thing on this over at James’ post today, so go read that, but the basic gist is: if you believe in snake oil, you’re an idiot. If I have to sell you snake oil to make you buy a product you already know you need, you are doubly an idiot. And I don’t think I’m going too far out on a limb with that statement.
The thing is, I’ve totally fallen for snake oil in the past. But I was about twelve years old at the time. And you know what? The product didn’t change my life. None of the products changed my life. And the more I looked around, the only times I’d ever felt like an idiot was when I fell for snake oil pitches. When I just needed a product and went out and found the one with the solution I needed, I was fine. Everything was great, in fact. I felt pretty smart.
If I need a product, I go seeking a good product. Don’t tell me it’ll change my life. I know it won’t. And the fact that you think I’m stupid enough for fall for it makes me believe you’re not selling something real. It makes me think you’re selling snake oil. Which means I’m liable to go for straightforward dude next to you, who just says, hey, I can fix that. You can fix that? This problem right here? Great. I’ll talk to you. The guy who says he can fix that AND make me shit gold bricks? He can keep it. That’s gotta hurt, anyway.
Melinda – But of course I am. I am always right.
Barbara – Thanks very much. I actually forgot this was going to run on April Fool’s Day. I should’ve been funnier. It’s a good chance for funny.
Lisa – See, that’s what this post was supposed to be all about. A chance for parents to talk up their definitely not stupid children. Only you get me, Lisa. The rest of these guys are all on about marketing and stuff. ::sigh:: I’m all alone . . .
I’ll say this – don’t equate “snake oil” to regular, everyday marketing. There’s a HUGE difference between lying to get a sale and pointing out what should be obvious but what may not be.
Nowhere – NOWHERE – do I promote lying, deceit or screwing people. I really dislike the link made between snake oil and normal sales strategies. They are not the same.
True, there’s a line between lying and simply amplifying. But it’s often a fine enough line that it makes me edgy. Say it’s something as simple as “buy my copywriting and your business will succeed!” Is it true? Well, probably. I certainly hope so. That’s why I write it. But there are any manner of things completely out of my control that can prevent that from actually happening. If I write fantastic copy for a website that my client doesn’t ever market, then no, my writing probably won’t make his business skyrocket. Even though I promised him it would.
Which I why I’m more comfortable with things like, “Hey, you need awesome copy and I DO awesome copy. What a happy symmetry we make.”
I’m not trying to hurt your feelings, Jamie-boy. Hunter and I drifted into sales a bit there. We’re not suggesting you like the snake oil salesman. Nobody likes the snake oil salesman. He’s an ass.
Incidentally, “snake oil”‘s just my shorthand for things that aren’t exactly what they seem. It’s not my code for big nasty lying bastard.
Probably an ill analogy, since of course snake oil guy doesn’t actually sell what he says he’s selling, which is of course not true for anything we’re selling. We are in fact selling, you know, copywriting or web design or whatever. And we will in fact deliver said copywriting or web design.
Ooh! I found my problem! It’s that the FEATURE seems real. “Really awesome copywriting” IS “really awesome copywriting”. Irrefutable. Especially ours. Ours is totally really awesome. No one would give us the lie on that one. “Really awesome copywriting that will completely change your life” is . . . well. It’s refutable. I don’t know that it will change your world. I hope it will. I think if you use it the right way, it will. But it’s out of my hands at that point, so I feel funny promising it.
I remember hearing somewhere that you have to tell someone something *seven times* before they get it. Which sounds like a whole lot, until you contemplate having to write fresh copy that tells someone something seven freaking times. Then it sounds positively ungodly.
Note: I am not choosing a side here, nor am I going anywhere near the sex/sports talk.
Catherine Cantieri, Sorted´s last blog post…Introducing my free eBook: "How to Harness a Hobgoblin"!
First let me say, I usually love your posts. This time though I really believe you got this one wrong. I humbly disagree that people are stupid. Most people are ‘unconscious’, not stupid. Meaning that they are unaware of the unconscious values that drive their behavior. Because of my line of work (unconscious changework), I’m exposed everyday to people who, although aware of their wants, are completely unaware of the underlying value that they are trying to fulfill through the want. In other words, people don’t want things – they want the fulfillment of some hidden value they place on the things they want. I agree with James here, if you end with superficial wants (benefits) – without touching on the underlying, largely unconscious values – which is why those benefits are important – you are overlooking the fact that people do not consciously choose. Every choice is an unconscious choice first, followed by an conscious justification for the choice. The unconscious mind processes information 1/2 second before the conscious mind catches up. And that’s a neurological fact! So you better be talking to the real decision maker – the unconscious mind of the individual you are attempting to persuade – because that’s where you have your greatest influence. The way to do that is to keep digging for the hidden values your product or service are actually fufilling, which may be outside of your readers conscious awareness, even as it is motivating or demotivating them to respond to your copy.